Potential Candidates for Antichrist?

"He will appear to rise from the dead..."

”One of the heads of the beast seemed to have had a fatal wound, but the fatal wound had been healed. The whole world was astonished and followed the beast.” – Revelation 13:3

While you are cynically weighing the writing quality of this tongue-in-cheek bit and how much of a desperate stretch it is, remember that not all which has been foretold has yet come to pass! The above passage from the butt of the Good Book could easily describe this former Lieutenant Governor and current junior United States Senator from Pennsylvania.

John Fetterman was mere weeks into his Senate term when he abruptly checked himself into Walter Reed National Military Medical Center in February for “post-stroke depression”. Fetterman had previously suffered a near fatal stroke in May 2022 according to his own staffers, resulting in an inability to speak fluidly or to process spoken conversation into meaning. Despite this, he bravely took the debate stage anyway, occasionally saying funny things like, “I do support fracking, and I don’t...I don’t...I support fracking, and I stand, and I do support fracking.”

During his campaign, Fetterman’s health suffered the slings and arrows of his nastiest critics. It was little help that his unsightly yet oddly hypnotic neck lump, frequently obscured by hoodie tops or unlikely scarf choices, fueled endless public medical hypotheses, with speculation ranging from goiter to lymph nodes to alien implants. While Fetterman hasn’t been seen in public since checking into the nuthouse, predictions of his imminent return have begun to circulate. On March 6th, CBS reported Fetterman would be back “soon”. Likewise on March 23rd, CBS again heralded the return of the thing (on his neck). Meanwhile new legislation has emerged bearing his name, suggesting a man in the shadows with a Machiavellian long-range plan to earn the sympathies and praise of the compassionate left by playing the tard card.

From Flip City Vol. 17. Art by David MacDowell.

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